It has always been my intention not to get political here. And hopefully, this post doesn't come off that way. The only agenda I'm interested in pushing is how awesome I am, and while that sounds horrible, it's at least honest. So please, don't take this as political, read it as personal. Because that's all it ever is with me.
Whenever something really gay happens, my friends look to me for my opinion because I am half gay on my mom's side. My mom is "married" to a woman who also has kids and we call ourselves the Gay-dy Bunch because we are hilarious. I'll insert a few FAQs here because I always get questions:
1. How long as your mom been gay? Forever. She just took a while to figure it out. She's late for everything, this was no exception. Yes, she married a man (hi, dad) and had some kids and then got a divorce and started dating ladies. I was about 8 when I figured this out.
2. Do you like your mom's wife? Yes. I love my mother's wife. She came into the picture when I was 18 and out of the house so it's not like she helped raise me. Regardless, she is a swell lady. And for what it's worth, I love her kids too. Remember when I wrote about taking my step-brother to the zoo? That's her youngest son. Any of the problems I've had with her would have happened as a result of her being with my mother and not because of her sexual preference.
3. Did your mom try to push her gay agenda on you? Yes. As I child I was only allowed to watch Ellen and NEVER Oprah and I wasn't allowed to play with straight kids in the neighborhood. My Barbies had to date other girl Barbies and when I asked to go to church she told me I had to stay home and practice witchcraft with her. I was home schooled to avoid learning about straight conspiracies like the moon landing and global warming. Stupid questions get stupid answers.
If you have questions about what it's like to have a gay mom, you can email me and I will answer you honestly. But back to my original point...
YOU CAN NEVER EAT AT CHICK-FIL-A AGAIN BECAUSE THEIR NUGGETS ARE FILLED WITH HOMOPHOBIC HATRED AND THE SWEET TEA IS BREWED WITH INTOLERANCE.
Haha, just kidding. GUYS, it's a chicken fucking sandwich, and it's delicious. In the midst of the most recent controversy surrounding Christ-Fil-A's President speaking out against gay marriage, I've seen all kinds of "well I'm gonna boycott the shit out of that place" type things on Facebook. And as hilarious as the memes are, I am going to tell you a secret:
Liking a post does not make you an activist. The fact that you watched the Kony video or reblogged a clever quote or pinned some picture of chicks making out doesn't make you a champion for gay rights.
I have a problem with the Chick-Fil-Gay outrage for two reasons. First,
the mentality that not contributing (i.e. spending money) with the enemy
is helping is false. Dick-Fil-A will make millions regardless, and they
will continue to donate to Focus on the Family whether or not they
swindle you out of 4 dollars (American) for a chicken sandwich. Second,
there is an alarming rate of inconsistency amongst reactionary boycotters. Are you boycotting Salvation Army, Target, Best Buy or Heinz? Do you know why you 'should' be? Are you doing anything else? Protesting unfair laws or campaigning for
equality in any other way? Are you writing letters to congressmen or
helping to lobby for equal rights? Are you fighting discrimination
against the LGBTQWERTY community? No? You just gave up the chicken
caesar wrap? Well, don't be surprised when the gays don't
rush to give you a rainbow sticker at the next PFLAG meeting. Did you have to google PFLAG? I rest my case.
Go volunteer at an AIDS clinic. March at Pride. Donate to charities that help gay youth. Vote on legislation that matters. Do something that will actually make a difference. The fact that you swore off waffle fries isn't going to help my moms get legally married in the state of Florida.
Related: my brother, step-brother and step-sister all work at a Chick-Fil-A. As teenagers, they are smart enough to realize that they don't need to prescribe to their company's beliefs. Making milkshakes and stocking straws doesn't mean they are standing in their mothers' way to equality. And our moms are just happy they have jobs.
Unrelated: my step-brother and step-sister are Jewish, but they thank Chick-Fil-A for the Sundays off.
9 comments:
*slow clap* Great post. The only thing undermining our country is, in fact, the ignorance of it's people.
I know this might not sit well with some, but I really don't have a problem with what he said. He has a right to his beliefs, ignorant as they may be. He isn't firing gays or calling for them to be round up and shot. A blatantly Christian company supports "traditional" marriage... shocking. But the reaction, however well-intended, is so misguided and misinformed that it makes my head hurt.
This might help... it quotes his comments that started all this:
http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2012/07/19/chick-fil-a-and-gay-marriage-a-social-media-storm/
As usual, well done. Though I do think you are dangerously close to quelling an instinct or attempt to take a stand because it is not as hardcore or informed as you are. I love the concept that liking a picture or post does not a stand make but stands are not binary and the approach that I am more real because I do more, while interesting, is undermining to anyone who may become as hardcore as you are after engaging in the crawling before they walk.
Now I hate Chik-Fil-A because their shit is not as good as people make it out to be and it is over priced. Truth be told, I have no issue with someone expressing their beliefs. I may think they are an asshole but I would prefer to have those people in the light of day rather than in the shadows. Furthermore, I applaud leveraging economic power to point out disapproval of a stance as it is a pure and arguably Darwinisn way to weed out douchebagery.
Anyway, I liked the article. Attacking the people who may not be as hardcore seems like our discussion of OG Depeche Mode fans to me.
Not once did I say I was hardcore about boycotting or any such thing. And I knew I'd get this response from you anyway.
I agree with not bashing those who "crawl before they walk" because, everyone starts somewhere. My point is that in two weeks most people will forget about nailing Chick-Fil-A to a cross and be mad about animal cruelty or some shit. They aren't even crawling, they're just 'liking.'
Whether or not you do make an economic difference as an individual is something of great interest to me; either way, one should spend their dollars as they choose. I don't buy Nike shoes for this reason, but I'm not leading the charge against sweatshops by any means. I also just hate Nikes.
Perhaps I should have been more clear, but it is the REACTIONARY rise and fall that bothers me. If you're going to do something, then DO it. You can't just say "this outrages me," and pat yourself on the back.
No matter what the fight is, there will always be newbies to the front lines, and I will always applaud those who stand up for those without voices or those who work towards equality of any kind.
But I have no patience for those who clutter up social media with half-cocked opinions and misinformed notions of making a difference. In my opinion, it distracts from the real conversation.
As someone who has no patience for almost anything I can appreciate your frustration. As to cluttering up social media it would appear social media is doing a good job of that by dumbing everything down to 140 characters of misspelled bullshit, but I digress.
As Facebook killed the word and concept of 'Friend' (Or at least watered it way the fuck down) they have driven compliance or agreement to a new low with the ease of the "Like." Fortunately, people are easy to block from a social stream in most cases. For the people that I claim may grow past the generic Like to a legitimate and informed stance (which I give you credit for above, was not trying to paint you with the militant brush), they can easily crawl back into the stream when they engage in the conversation you call out above. The essence of what I think the best part of social media can be but that has sadly fallen by the wayside for a bunch of megaphone holding asshats.
I share with you a desire for people to be more engaged and involved in whatever they give a shit about. Hell, at the very least google the thing and learn about it. But I guess I just don't get as annoyed by this particular thing as you do which is fine as well.
It's probably an age thing, which is not meant to make you feel old, Grandpa. It's MY generation's general malaise that pisses me off.
That, and truly thinking that abstaining from Chick-Fil-A makes you a saint. IT. DOESN'T.
I agree. It is an age thing. Your generation is (by and large) lazy and amazingly judgemental (though tough as shit behind the anonymity the internet provides). I remember when I was a youth (you know, the dark ages) having an opinion and putting it out there meant you might catch a beating (or get smacked down or whatever the cool, Ed Hardy types call it nowadays).
Love that you can take the posting of the goofy ass images on the issue (this issue but it applies to others) and draw that the person posting feels like a Saint. They might just be lazy. :-) Oh yea and my generation is actually just as bad about this particular pile of shit. Sadly. At least you guys have youth to blame.
I think there are lots of "kids my age" actually doing wonderful things using the interwebz (as we say) as a great bully pulpit. Problem is, there's tons of noise pollution and while the conversation may be harder to discern, it is at least still there.
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